Dear Parents of Sons

My last post was triggered when I met a this girl who is looking to get married ASAP. The mother of this poor girl kept telling me to advise her regarding marriage, and how she needs to change her self if she wants to “land a suitable match” and  all the Do’s and Don’ts of living with the in-laws etc etc. I thought to myself, all this effort in molding your daughter; why can’t people put like 20% of that effort in their boys.

Here are the Top 4 things that should be said to the Guys

  1. Always respect women

    Treat them like you would want your mom/sister to be treated.

  2. Women are sentimental and compassionate beings

    They may yell at you one second but the next she will be in the kitchen making you a delicious meal. So when she is cranky, just lend her an ear. She may not have anyone else to talk to. She spends all day taking care of your home and family. It is the only thing that gets her through her day.

  3. Learn the art of BALANCE

    It is the key to a happy life. Balance can be about anything. E.g. Don’t take unnecessary sides of either your family (specially moms) or your wife, she understands you love your family and there is no woman who can take that place. But it is YOUR job that the woman you CHOSE to bring in to your life, is never reminded of that.

  4. Hug her & Say Thank YOU

    You have no idea how far this one goes. Do you know what it is like to slave away all day without a salary? To do night shifts and morning shifts in a row? To be available at all times regardless of your own health/mood/plans? Just a little acknowledgment can lift up her spirits. When she cooks or buys gifts for your family…acknowledge her generosity and buy her something pretty.  Do not treat her as if that is her primary Goal in life. It is not. YOU are her primary goal. Your children are her primary objective. NOT your entire family.

 

I also previously I wrote an open letter Dear Parents of Daughters. Do check it out!

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The Talk

We all know that “Talk”right? The one our moms have with us right before we are married. (In some cases you hear it all through your teenage life.) You know the one I’m talking about;

Here is a roundup of the Top 4 offensive things that are often said to Desi Bride-to-Be’s

  1. “My daughter, you are getting married into a nice family, be thankful of that.”

    (jee mom you say that as if I don’t deserve them) .

  2. “Take care of them. Behave. Always stay quiet. If they say something just ignore it. Do not reply back. Respect the in-laws.”

    (What does respect have to do with staying quiet? why are we teaching our daughters that? speaking up for your self in a manner that is not offensive to any body is also do-able you know)

  3. “Don’t work if your husband does not allow it.”

    (well is he promising to spoil you like your dad did and to take care of all your expenses and demands? oh puhlease… educate the girls! Teach them to be independent so they have the opportunity to explore who they are and what they desire to become…& not just a shadow. if she personally wants to stay at home? that is her choice. Luckily that’s the one good thing about being a girl 🙂 you can choose).

  4. Learn how to cook perfectly! Serve their guests when they come over other wise they will question your mother’s upbringing.

    (WHO THE HECK put the meter to measure a woman’s upbringing INSIDE a CUP OF TEA made by her DAUGHTER?)

As per my experience, 85% of the “Talk” has been conducted with the young ladies and not the gentlemen. As a mother of a little boy, I feel it is just as important to have that TALK with a boy as with girls. For more honest take on that please watch this space!

Please read a post I have previously wrote to the Parents of Daughters.

xox